We Need Compassion
By Barrington H. Brennen, August 3, 2026
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What
is the greatest need of The Bahamas? Is it more
local agriculture, tourists, lower food and gas
prices? It seems not so obvious to many that
our greatest need right now is compassion. The
Cambridge Dictionary defines compassion this
way: “Compassion means noticing when someone is
hurting, caring about their pain, and wanting to
help make it better. It comes from old words
that means "to suffer together."
To further expound, Greater Good Magazine states
in the article “What is Compassion?” the
following: “Psychologists define compassion as
the feeling that arises when you are confronted
with another's suffering and feel motivated to
relieve that suffering. Compassion is not the
same as empathy or altruism, though the concepts
are related.” The more compassion there is in
society, there will be less crime, family
violence, abuse in all its forms, corruption,
abuse of power, etc.
Compassion in marriage is the shared choice to
notice your partner's pain, feel with them, and
respond with kindness instead of judgment. It
replaces daily resentment with emotional safety,
deep trust, and lasting connection. I also
present compassion as a basic preservation tool
to keep romantic relationships healthy. Here is
how I define compassion in this context.
“Compassion in marriage is the spirit of
kindness, gentleness, understanding,
graciousness, and a non-judgmental attitude. It
is also the ability to look beyond the pain and
confusion by extending a measure of respect,
honor, and wanting-to-understand-you-better
attitude.” This kind of compassion produced
passion. Passion is the emotional,
intellectual, and physical intimacy in a
romantic relationship.
In this article, I am focusing on compassion in
the family and society. On the fourth Saturday
in August each year, the Seventh-day Adventist
Churches around the world conduct enditnow
day, a day to focus on ending family
violence. This year it is on Saturday,
August 22nd. This is an
annual event to share about family and couple
violence and to help members bring an end to
family violence and how to prevent it.
This year the theme is “Compassion.” Here is
what Galina Stele, Women’s Ministries world
director of the Adventist Church, states about
this year’s theme: “Compassion helps us see
people in a different way. We see them as
valuable, though they might be hurt or
suffering. We see in them people who deserve to
be hugged, loved, understood, helped, and
cherished.”
Keren
Holfold, the Adventist Trans-European Director
of Family, Children’s, and Health Ministries,
expands further: “Compassion happens when we
respond to someone else’s suffering by relieving
their distress and bringing comfort, joy, peace,
and gratitude. Compassion is the opposite of
abuse. When abuse happens, an abuser chooses to
make a vulnerable person feel even more
helpless, sad, afraid, and distressed. Whenever
Christ’s followers choose to show compassion to
others and to bless them, they demonstrate that
God is loving and kind too. It is very important
to fight abuse and reduce domestic violence. To
reduce abuse now, and in the future, it is vital
to cultivate Christ-like compassion in our
hearts and to teach others how to show
compassion too.”
Sadly, compassion is a missing component in far
too many families and romantic relationships
today. One very common way of knowing this is
the number of children running away from home.
In a previous article, I stated that the
majority of runaways are not really running to
something or someone. They are really from a
dysfunctional, painful, cold, and violent home.
This is because the adults/guardians/parents in
the home very seldom, if at all, demonstrate
compassion. They call their children demeaning
names and give more criticism than praise. They
actually treat them like slaves and people who
do not have feelings and intellect. This kind
of treatment will produce violence. The
violence could be verbal or emotional, and in
many cases, physical violent behavior—violent
fights, murder, rape, sexual molestation, etc.
A key thought that will be shared on Saturday,
August 22nd in Adventist Churches
worldwide is this: “When people have
experienced abuse, violence, trauma, loss, and
other deeply painful experiences, they often
have many complex needs. Sometimes we feel that
their needs are more than we can manage. But
compassion does not have to solve all their
problems. Research shows that noticing people,
listening to them, understanding their feelings,
and doing at least one thing to let them know
that someone else cares can make a huge
difference for a person’s well-being.
Dear readers, is there compassion in your home?
Parents, are you truly listening to your
children? Not just their laughter, but also
their tears, pain, frustrations,
disappointments, and dreams? Spouses, are you
compassionate towards each other? Do you talk
so your partner will listen and listen so they
will talk? Or are you often the cause of the
pain? Simply put, are you compassionate? If
not, I counsel you to begin practicing
compassion today.
Barrington H.
Brennen is a marriage and family therapist.
Send your questions or comments to question@soencouragement.org or
call 1242 327 1980 or visit www.soencouragement.org
