- Spiritual Intimacy
- Article by Barrington H. Brennen, October
many couples are not enjoying an intense level of intimacy in their marriages.
What is intimacy? Intimacy
is closeness in a relationship, gained by revealing your true self to another
is the sharing of parts of your life that you should only share with your
spouse, whether it is intellectual, spiritual, emotional, or sexual. To explain further, intimacy includes the sharing of
thoughts and ideas that have deep meaning between an individual and another
person who is valued highly. To develop an intimate relationship with another
person, one must first place oneself in a vulnerable position.
this series of articles I will share
four types of intimacy. They
are emotional, intellectual,
physical, and spiritual intimacy.
In this article I am focusing on spiritual intimacy, because I feel
it is the foundation on which other types of intimacies will flourish.
we share with you the concepts of Spiritual Intimacy as presented in the
book Stages of Intimacy by Laura Dawn Lewis.
You and your partner have achieved spiritual intimacy if you can
answer Yes to all of these situations:
speaking to friends you no longer refer to you and your partner as
individuals, you and he/she are we
introduce each other as boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife.
both know who you are and have resolved any mental/psychological, addiction
and relationship issues from the past.
Codependency does not exist in your relationship.
have short-term and long-term goals and objectives based upon your
morals and ethics have been articulated to each other and you are in
agreement with each other regarding the basic principles that define each of
you. These do not have to match
perfectly, however those not in agreement must be tolerable to each partner.
Blocks to Spiritual Intimacy
compiled this list of road blocks to spiritual intimacy. This is not an
exhaustive list. However, it is designed to help you to think about your
carefully and see how do you measure up:
Finances are kept apart. (Separate bank accounts, no
family budget, and no joint planning)
Personal goals do not blend.
Worshiping at separate churches.
Sitting in separate pews in church.
Seldom going to fun time events together.
Seldom having family worship together.
Seldom seen in public together.
When making love there must be total darkness.
Flesh is Marriage
dear friend, intimacy in marriage is when you and your partner have become
“one flesh.” ONE FLESH in marriage encompasses the blending of the
physical, emotional, psychological, mental, financial, and spiritual
aspects of both husband and wife.
In Genesis 2:2-24 in shares how God made Adam and Eve one flesh:
And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and
brought her unto the man. 23. And
Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be
called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
24. Therefore shall a man
leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they
shall be one flesh.”
of Solomon 6:3 presents the one flesh concept with these word:
am my lover’s and my lover is mine . . .
you spiritually intimate? Dear
friend, return next week when I will share more about intimacy in marriage.
INTELLECTUAL INTIMACY Barrington H. Brennen is a
marriage and family therapist. Send
your questions or comments SOE P.O. Box N896, Nassau, Bahamas. Or email firstname.lastname@example.org