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- Condemnation or Compassion
- By Barrington H. Brennen, July 24, 2003
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- Perhaps the greatest challenge facing parents, church, community, or
government leaders is how to balance condemnation with compassion, or
justice with mercy. The discussion continues to rage regarding
homosexuality. In the heat of the discussion, when most voices are
condemning the homosexual lifestyle, we are not hearing much about
compassion, grace, or mercy. When one criticizes, one should also
provide some solution to the problem. When one condemns, one should
provide compassion and grace. If not, one will make enemies.
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- CONDEMNING HOMOSEXUALITY
- My own personal conviction and Judeo-Christian beliefs propel my view
that the homosexual lifestyle is not acceptable in God’s sight, and
that one can be redeemed from it. On the other hand, the very beliefs
that undergird my stance against homosexuality also demand that I
accept the homosexual as a person who is covered by the grace of a
loving, understanding, and compassionate God. It is also true to say
that to condemn is human but to love and forgive is divine.
Our society will not find healing if we allow ourselves
to get enraged about evils in our society but do provide a measure of hope
to those who are destroying themselves, committing crimes, or living
inordinate lifestyles.
- THE DILEMMA
The truth is that some who are reading this article will call me a
pro-gay activist because I am talking about compassion and grace toward
the homosexual. On the other hand some will call be homophobic simply
because I believe that the homosexual lifestyle is wrong. I’ve been
writing about this subject for more than ten years, and I’ve noticed
that this dilemma exists also among homosexuals themselves.
Those homosexuals who are seeking change, recovery, or
inner peace, find my articles to be compassionate, understanding, and
helpful. Recently I received an email from a Christian living in a little
town in the United States who came across my articles on homosexuality on my
web site (www.soengouragement.org) . Read her own words:
"It is surely the Lord that brought me to your
website! I'm a 28-year-old woman, raised in a cloistered, strict Baptist
household with little contact with the opposite sex. Because of
this, I have felt for many years that I could be bisexual, or even
homosexual. I know that the acting out of these impulses
would definitely be sin, but I felt that even my tendency towards it was
despicable. In desperation, I typed in "overcoming your
homosexuality" on google.com, and I got your wonderful article on
"Overcoming the Homosexual Lifestyle." I can't tell you how
much the Lord opened my eyes and blessed me through that article! You
dealt with the issue in a loving, encouraging, logical way without
compromising what the Bible says. You didn't just preach, you gave
reasoning, verses, and active steps for me to work on the issue. I feel
empowered! I give you my heartiest thanks, and I want to let you know
how much Jesus Christ is seen in your counsel."
A few months ago I had a three-day video series on the
homosexual lifestyle, roots, and recovery. In response to my advertisement
about the event I got a few emails and calls from persons who identified
themselves as homosexual Christians, but who really were really hurting
inside and were seeking help for years. Their only problem was they were
afraid to come to the video showings because they did not want to be
ridiculed.
Yes, there are homosexuals who want to change, and they
can only be changed by love, not condemnation.
- THE SAD TRUTH WE MUST ACCEPT
- Not only do I have many favorable responses to my articles from
homosexuals, I also get a few unfavorable responses from
"contended homosexuals" who do not want to change their
lifestyles. One leader in the Bahamian gay community responded to my
article entitled "Homosexual Recovery" with the question:
"Why do you believe that homosexuals want to recover?" He
said that they are happy with their lifestyle and do not want to
change. His response is mixed with truth and error. He is correct,
that there are homosexuals who are very happy with their choice of
lifestyle and feel that it is a "natural," God-given gift.
On the other hand, there are countless homosexuals who are unhappy and
confused from the turmoil within their minds and bodies. They want a
change. They want freedom. They want peace. This is seen by the
hundreds who join each year organizations like Exodus International
and Homosexual Anonymous–successful Christian ministries designed to
help those who want to recover from the homosexual lifestyle. There
are hundreds of lesbians and homosexuals who have successfully exited
that lifestyle and are living contended, productive heterosexual
lives.
The truth is, as a Christian and a psychologist, I must
accept the fact that God has given each person the freedom to choose
whatever lifestyle he or she wants, even if that lifestyle in non-productive
or anti God. That right to choose does not mean that one must be granted the
legal privilege to practice all facets of that lifestyle. A person has a
right to engage in devil worship, but the government will not give the right
to perform human sacrifices. That will be murder.
- THE CHRISTIAN’S DUTY
The Christian’s duty is to provide an avenue for healing to those
homosexuals who want a change in their lives, and to present a
compassionate, respectful attitude toward those who choose not to change.
We can love the homosexual and disagree with the homosexual lifestyle. We
can condemn the sin, but show compassion to the erring ones. Let’s
create a balance between condemnation and compassion. Call 393 2818
for more information.
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